// December 8th, 2016 // Uncategorized

I want to sleep. I really am. I am tired of today, hectic disaster… But I’m afraid when I sleep that nightmare will come and haunted me even more. But no, this is so real, it’s not a dream. I was broken. I thought you were healing me. But no, you just broke me even more… Have you ever been so sad that it physically hurts inside? That the only person who can make you feel better is also the reason why you cry and you asking for living somewhere nobody could find you.

It’s just amazing how the heart makes no noise when it cracks. One day I will stop checking my phone and it won’t hurt not hearing from you. Yes, I am the one who believes. I am the one who closes my eyes and my ears from what they’ve said. If I could show you how awful you made me feel, you would never be able to look me in the eye again. But how do you let go of the person that felt like home? I will buy a new one. If I can’t make it I will rent it!

You have no idea how worthless you made me feel. I broke my own heart. It’s not your fault, It was me that I let you do it, but no more. Someday you’re gonna send me a message out of the blue and someday I’m going to have the strength to ignore it. I hope one day I’ll pop up in your head and you”ll think “I shouldn’t let her go”. But for sure you are too late to just regret it.

When someone truly cares about you, they make an effort. I know you do but, you easily give up! And when they ask you about me and you find yourself thinking back on all our memories, I hope you ache in regret as the truth hits you like a bullet and you find yourself replying, she loved me more than anyone else in the entire world and I destroyed her. Just because I am strong enough to handle pain doesn’t mean I deserve it. Forget about him. You are losing sleep over a boy who is sleeping well. You will search for me in another person. I promise!

You can’t just give up on someone because the situation’s not deal. I will never be good enough for you. I got it. But don’t forget you won’t get any gold easily! Have a nice life. I’m done trying to be in it. So let’s ignore each other, try to pretend the other doesn’t exist. Time can heal, I’ll be ok.

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